Puking Up A Half Gallon Of Milk...............

Well, well, well, a typed email again... I hate this.

So Monday, I went to Maria (the lady with a baptismal date). I went to her house, and she is super nice. But we get there, and she's like, "Here, have some cake and milk." It's a half gallon, and my companion does not drink anything but water. Also, he doesn't like sugar, so it's up to me to do this thing alone. She's like, "We won't start until you're finished eating." Again, she says, "Drink all the milk. I don't want it," but she's commanding it, "Toman, toman," "Toman todo de la leche." And I have to do this whole thing alone, so I'm off to the races. I ate a few slices of cake, but it was the milk that was the challenge. So I take my cup and start going glass after glass, and I am feeling good. I love milk. I can do this all day. So I start going, cake slice, three cups of milk, cake slice, three cups of milk. Then I decide I can't finish the cake, but I will be able to do the milk. So I start going, glass after glass, and then comes the last third of the milk. I am actually dying now. Three pieces of cake and two-thirds of the half gallon of milk is a lot. So I keep going. I have about three glasses left. One down, I feel a little sick, but it's okay. Two down, a little worse, but we are able to handle the pain. And I get to the last glass, and oh dear, oh me, oh my. I bring it up to my nose, smell it, and I'm like, "I can't. I'm going to puke." And my companion is just laughing. (Maria is in her kitchen right now), and I am like, "I got it. I can do it. I love milk," so I take it and I drink it. Bad idea. I'm like, "Bro, I am going to puke. I can't just puke on her yard." So I ran to the jungle next to her house and barfffffffffffff. All this milk came back up. Then Maria comes out. I'm on the side of her house, and she's like, "Where's Alberto?" Apparently, the Elder Tew sounds like Alberto, so she thinks my name is Alberto. But anyways, I'm puking on the side of her house, and my comp goes, "I think he's in your bathroom," and she's like, "Oh, okay, sounds good," and goes back to her kitchen. And I come back, and I have snot and milk all over my face and in my nostrils, and I'm in a mask, and it stinks, and I'm coughing. Then she's like, "Finish the cake," and I'm like, "Can you get me a napkin?" and I put the rest of the cake in a ziplock and throw it in my backpack. Lol.

Then Tuesday, we went to her house, and she wasn't home. And her daughters basically told us to stop coming back because she's Catholic and old and doesn't need to come to our church. It was really weird. And then Maria called us and was like, "My daughters said you can't come because it's COVID," and we're like, "That's not what they said to us." So yeah, we will be going back soon. She said after a week when the COVID goes down, we can go over, but it's a little suspicious, and I don't know. Anyways, please pray for Maria Vegas' daughters and family to have softened hearts. Thank you!

Friday night, we saw plantains for 50 cents, and we bought 20 and made tons of tostones and ate them all. We were feeling in pain for a whole day. Then we decided to buy a big pizza Saturday night and eat that whole thing, so we had lots of grease, and our bodies were in pain. Anyways, I feel good after I decided to make a lettuce smoothie with just water and lettuce. Oh my goodness, it was so gross. It had the consistency of applesauce, but it was lettuce. It was horrible, but I felt good after. That's all that matters. Anyways, my comp has eaten 10 of my chocolate laxatives and 3 laxative pills he bought, so he's had 13 laxantes in the last 50 hours, and he's still constipated. Lol. I guess we had too much oil. Anyways, that's kinda funny.

We met this lady the other week, and she was super nice. Then we came over to her house, and she was super angry with everything and us and was yelling at us. And we just stayed calm and kept talking and asking her questions and sharing stuff from the Book of Mormon. Anyways, that was cool to be able to bring that light of Christ and the Spirit to her and make her feel happy. I never realized how easy it is as missionaries to just bring the Spirit into someone's heart or life, but it truly is that easy. We literally bring it with us everywhere we go, and that's so cool.

I don't know what else happened. I hate typing so much.

Our car's check engine light went on, and now it's off after we washed our car. So that's weird.

We found a family whose son fell off the roof, and that was cool to tell her he's in the spirit world and to be able to testify that to her was so powerful. It's crazy that this knowledge is just so unknown. It's really cool to bring that hope and have her feel that spirit. "I haven't felt this spirit like this ever in my life." It was kinda extra cool because we really felt like we should go to her neighborhood, and we ignored it. Then we went the next day, and she really needed to hear it. I feel like her son is trying to tell us something or help us because she seems really elect. Hopefully, we can help her. Another time, I felt the ability to just bring the spirit into this lady's home and testify to her what is happening. So that was awesome.

I love being a missionary. I hate typing emails. I'll see you next week. I love you all.

Moses 6:60: "For by the water ye keep the commandment; by the Spirit ye are justified, and by the blood ye are sanctified."

Think about that. It's a really powerful verse.

We found a banana tree this week, and there were no houses, just abandoned. So we cut off the bananas and took them. As we were walking, we got swarmed with bees. Not kidding, millions. I don't know how I'm not stung. My comp saw me run and scream like a little girl down the neighborhood. I think someone let out their bee farm thing. It was a million. A million, not exaggerating. Then some neighbor saw us with the bananas and gave us more. Lol. I think they don't want as many bananas as they have here. Anyways, we're banking out on guineo, so that's sick. Also, I almost got killed by three stray dogs after the bee attack. It was so scary.