You Got To Pay To Play (I Promise We Didnt Gamble)

So, Monday last week, we were cleaning our house and I was like, "Bro... I've got to clean this house so well. Our shower is freaking filthy." I'm bored. I'm just going to deep clean this place. So, I decided to deep clean the place. I poured bleach all over the shower and grabbed a scrub brush to clean it. The cleaning part is going really well. I'm cleaning the shower and it's getting so white. But then, halfway through, I start feeling light-headed. Bro, I'm about to pass out. I think I was just exposing myself to too much bleach. I was giving myself lung cancer, so I needed to step out and get some fresh air. I freaking burnt my face that day. The rest of the day, I felt tired, like I had a sunburn. I'm like, "Frick, bro. What did I just do to my body?"

Anyway, since I wasn't able to finish, now we have a giant line in our shower, like a black mark. You can tell where I stopped cleaning. It's kind of funny. Then, while I was airing out the shower, I put a fan in there. For some reason, our fans always lose their caps or covers. Who would do that for no reason? There's no purpose. The only reason would be to put bread in it and shred it, like I did in Arecibo one time. Anyway, I placed the fan and as I was adjusting it, I accidentally boxed the fan and my finger. My finger hurt so bad, it got cut up. It was horrible. I hated that.

Then, on Monday night, we called Carmen and she was reading. And we were like, "Let's go! She's keeping her commitment." Then, we gave her another chapter to read, and Carmen was really into it. After that, Jesus Manuel called us and said, "You guys have to come back to my house. I felt the spirit so strongly when you were over." He said he needed that feeling in his life and that he loved us so much. Finally, someone who called us first instead of us doing all the work. Basically, we have a simp named Jesus now. He's freaking awesome. He'll probably get baptized.

The next day, we participated in a toy drive service. If you remember, two weeks ago, we mentioned having a toy drive where we unloaded around 3,000 toys with 13 people. This time, when we showed up, it was just me and Elder Granada. It was horrible. We had to carry 3,000 toys up the stairs, into a hallway, and then into a room. I was exhausted because I was the one doing the stairs since my companion has a bad knee. I lifted all those toys up the stairs, and I was so tired. Then, we organized everything, and in the end, we got free pizza. That's all that counts. The free pizza was so worth it. Even though we are not serving for money, the free pizza helped. That was lit.

Anyway, we went to a new area the next day, and we met another lady named Madarila. She was walking into her house while we were walking, and everyone else was running away from us. People do that because we are missionaries, and as soon as they see us, they instantly go inside. We're like, "Bro, you can't do that. That's cheating." Anyway, we saw Madarila and felt the need to call out to her before she entered her house. So, we yelled, and she started talking to us but received a phone call and went inside. We thought, "That's okay, we can wait." So, we waited for 10 minutes, just sitting there while she was on her phone with the door open. We were literally talking and waiting for this lady to come back. Then, I started having doubts, thinking she would just close the door and go away. I believed it was just the devil trying to discourage us. Anyway, she eventually came back out, and we taught her about the awesome restoration. She understood it, and we asked her if she knew how to pray. She replied, "No, I have never prayed." We responded, "Well, we can't judge you. We're here to teach you." So, we taught her and gave her a highlighted pamphlet on how to pray, the three steps. We handed it to her, but I don't know how to translate it. Address your Father in Heaven, express your thoughts and feelings. Anyway, we gave it to her, and she prayed. At first, I felt like she was just going through the motions. I thought she was doing it out of obligation. In my heart, I prayed, "Please touch this lady's heart." Right after I said that, she started crying. She felt the spirit so strongly, and it hit me as well. I started crying, which rarely happens when the spirit touches me. It was a profoundly powerful prayer, so beautiful. It was amazing to see her pray for the first time, connecting with her Heavenly Father. That was definitely one of the highlights of my week because it was truly awesome, helping that lady in that way. Then I got sunburned that day because we were out in the street for like five hours. I thought, "Bro, getting sunburned in December? This is crazy!" Then the next day, I don't even remember what happened. The only thing I wrote down is the pancake story.

So the next day, I'm not sure, but obviously, there were miracles and missionary work. The funniest thing is that when we got home for dinner, my companion said, "Let's make pancakes from this pancake mix." I mentioned that I found all this Bisquick mix, and he asked, "How many do you want? 18 pancakes, right?" I replied, "How many are we trying to make?" He said, "Dump the whole bag." I was surprised and said, "The whole bag? We're not going to eat the whole bag!" He insisted, "Do the whole bag!" So, we poured the entire bag and filled up the skillet I had bought two weeks ago with pancake batter. We cooked this giant pancake. My companion eats a lot of pancakes, and he ended up feeling sick and even vomited. Then we gave the rest of the pancakes to Fano, my disabled neighbor. He lives next to us, and it made his day. He came back the next day, thanking us for the pancake and asking for more. Anyway, the pancake situation was quite amusing.

After that, we went knocking on doors and met Maria Dagas, a really nice lady. My companion and I have a deal where I eat all the sugary treats, and he eats all the meats and food I don't want. Maria was offering us juice, and I had to drink it all. She also gave us a bunch of cracker cookies, and it was only 11 in the morning. I couldn't handle all that sugar at the moment. I wasn't feeling it, but I had to keep the deal with my companion. So, I ended up consuming all the sugar, and I felt so sick afterward.

Then, the next day was New Year's Eve. We were just kind of doing missionary stuff. Then we cleaned Pres Cartohanna's dog, Sniper. It was kind of fun, actually. Then we got to hold it. Then it started shaking. You know when dogs shake when they are wet? It was so weird. We were getting soaked. It was awesome. Then we came home, and I went to the bathroom and flushed the toilet, breaking the string. Now we have to flush the toilet with tongs. It's kind of funny. I have never seen a toilet flushed with tongs before, but it's sick.

Then, on New Year's Eve night, we had to go to bed at 10 because, obviously, we are missionaries and we do not stay up late. So, we went to bed at 10 or 10:30. Then, oh my gosh, I've never heard so many fireworks in my life. I woke up at 12 on the dot, and it was just like boom, boom, boom. Literally, our neighbors were lighting fireworks next to us in the grass. There were so many fireworks, and it went on until like 2:00 in the morning. It was so freaking loud. I've never seen a party so loud in my entire life. I was like, "Oh my gosh, you have no idea." It was literally the worst thing ever, but also the coolest thing at the same time. It just sucked because we could not sleep well. Actually, I went right back to sleep and didn't hear them.

Then, the next day, we were walking in the neighborhood and I found a coconut tree. You know how I am. I got a bad idea to try and get a coconut out of this tree. It's a super small tree, so I'm like trying to jump, and I'm too scared to jump, and I keep jumping like a little wuss. Then, I find a little branch of the tree, and I'm trying to hit this coconut out of the tree. Then, I turn around to the other side of it, and I can reach it. My companion was like, "I told you to go for that one in the beginning." And he gives me a knife, and we cut off this coconut. Anyway, I got this coconut. That was the coolest thing that day.

We found some lady who was super sick, but she wouldn't pray because she was too scared. I was like, "Bro, what are you doing? We're not judging you, we're missionaries. We are here to teach."

Diego has kind of been flaky, and we need you guys to pray for him hard. He liked to put out his baptismal date. Satan is just hitting hard. The devil's working hard, and he's smart, so we need your prayers for Diego because he's put his date and girls he used to talk to, and having bad dreams. It's been weird. So he kind of started getting flaky, and we are just praying and fasting because yesterday was Fast Sunday. Then he came to church and didn't leave the lesson for the second hour, and that was a freaking miracle. We are like, "Bro, let's go!" And then we bore our testimony about perseverance and enduring to the end. I kind of just felt like I needed to for the youth to go on a mission, but also for Diego. I really felt the Spirit telling me to talk about enduring to the end and to be a disciple instead of a follower, doing the work.

Then we went walking in the neighborhood, and we were like, "We need to go to this neighborhood." Yesterday we walked for two hours and found no one in this giant rich neighborhood. Uphills and stuff, it was horrible. Elder Granados was like, "Alright, Elder Tew, you picked this neighborhood. You'd better find someone good." Our transfer goal is 42 new friends, and we are at 38. So we were trying to find four so we could have a week before the transfer ends and find more. So we hit our goal, but this is the moral of the story. I feel like we need to go down this street. If you know you're receiving revelation, always listen to the first voice. Then Satan always sends doubt out behind your head, and he's like, "No, don't go down that street. There's no one here. Elder Granados is going to be pissed because you're not going to find anyone." I was like, "I'm just going to keep walking." And then we get there, and then we see this family of three just playing dominoes. It's just like three siblings, and they're all like 75, and they're all just hanging out for the New Year. I am like, "Freak. They are a family, and they are not going to talk to us, obviously. The devil is putting doubt in my head. We're going to go try." They were like, "Sit," so we sat down with them. We were so freaking apostate. We sat down with these people, and they brought out more pig intestines with blood. It is so disgusting. I've heard so many bad things from missionaries that have tried it, and I actually liked it, which is gross, but I guess I like the way pig intestines taste. Then we ate all these mercias. Then the lady comes out that brought the Marcia's, which is the esposa, the wife of Pedro. So there are three siblings and a wife. So now there are four friends, and we are just playing dominoes. They said, "You have to pay to play. We want you to play." I remember on Christmas Eve I had change. This is sick. I had change from when I bought a pizza, and I put it in my backpack when we got home. I had this feeling to put it in my backpack, and I had no idea why. I had forgotten about it until then. I just remembered that you have those coins in your bag. So I got it out, and they are like betting. We are just playing for fun. Obviously, we didn't keep the money. We just donated it to play. It was sick. I started from 0 and earned so much money. I gave my companion like 40 cents, and he got 3 bucks. We were beating these people. Also, granted they were a little bit tipsy. Obviously, they don't know the Word of Wisdom because they are just friends. We are just hanging out, kind of teaching them while we play. And then she brings out Marcia, and we like eat that, and then she brings out 2 sodas. I have to down those because my companion doesn't want sugar. I was like, "Freak, I have to drink 2 sodas." And then she brings out, what was next? Pastellas, and we were like, "Frick, bro." And then she gives us pastellas, and we eat that, and I gave mine to my companion because I do not like pastellas. I ate like a bite while she was looking and then passed it to him. We've got a good deal going on. It's a good business here. Gave us pastellas, then she came back with alcapurrias. She gives us the first food. It was so good. She just kept giving us more and more food. The wife of Pedro sharing the gospel and playing dominoes with these people was so freaking crazy. And then like the brother who already knows a lot about the church because his daughter lives in Utah, I think she might be a member. I don't think she's a member, but I think she has a lot of member friends. I'm not sure. Anyway, he knows a lot. He's not really interested in it at all. The siblings are super interested, and the wife. Freaking homeboy. His name is Edgardo, the guy that's not interested. He keeps giving shots to Pedro, just getting him more and more drunk. Pedro is finally like, "Bro, I'm done. I don't want any more alcohol." And he's like trying to offer my companion alcohol. Pedro is like, "Don't tempt them. They are young. They don't do that. Don't give them alcohol." Eduardo is like, "Fine, I won't." Then homegirl brings out shrimp, and we have to eat shrimp that is battered in butter and oil. It was so good. We were like, "Bro, homegirl keeps bringing us out food." She said, "You guys want some juice?" And we were like, "I cannot say no to juice." And she was like, "Okay." And they are laughing. They gave us juice, and this is the funniest thing. My companion doesn't want sugar, so I down the first one and hand him the cup. Then take his and start drinking. And then Pedro is like, "He straight up goes, 'It has lemon in it. Do you guys like the Orange juice with lemon?'" We said yes, it was good. My companion was like, "Yeah, it was good." He holds up the cup empty. Pedro's face was so shocked. He was like, "Wait. You drank that? They're sitting across from each other. He's been watching him the whole time. He said, 'When did you drink that? How did you drink that so fast?'" He was so shocked. I was like, "Yeah, that's because I drank it." Then we shared a super powerful restoration message with these people and found four new friends. I also forgot that homegirl knocked over her whiskey and dumped whiskey all over my leg. I was like, "You just dumped whiskey all over my leg while we were playing dominoes. I was like, 'No, what the heck?'" Obviously Eduardo's not interested in drinking. She just kind of moved the table and it fell on me. I was like, "Bro, you're kidding me. There's like this freaking drunk guy while these people are listening. Freak this, bro." It was kind of funny though. I wasn't really mad. Then she brought me a rag with soap and washed it. We taught a super, super great restoration message. When can we come back? They immediately gave us a day. Wednesday. We live here, but the siblings don't. One sibling was like, "I will be here, and we will cook, and we will have a good lesson." We were like, "Freak yeah. We just found all these elect people right here." It was awesome. That was sick. It was kind of sad though because it took us like 2 hours. We shared a message for 40 minutes, then we were sitting around talking, and then she kept bringing us food, and so we had to take that. I guess that counts as a real crazy week. And now I am here. That's everything.