Tew, Coleman T

Welcome back to the worst email on the planet, or maybe the worst missionary email. I hope you all enjoy wasting your time reading this. So on Monday, I parted ways with Elder Granados as he went to the mission home to fly to Saint Croix, which was cool because I got to be in a trio! I was in a trio for 2 days with Cayey, and that was such a blast. I laughed so hard. Elder White and Elder Hemming are goats. I also had no food, so I ate all of Elder Hemming's toast with their honey. My bad, sorry man. But it was cool to be in a trio for a day or two. We had a lesson with their most progressing friend, se llama Nilda, and so we went to their bishop's house for a family home evening, and it was super fun. The bishop did an object lesson I really liked. He had us sing, and whoever won got 50 pesos (they use the term "pesos" here as in money, even though "pesos" is the Spanish currency of the Dominican Republic because the Puerto Rican dollar is the US dollar). S...

1 Nephi 10:17: I, Nephi, was desirous also that I might see, and hear, and know of these things by the power of the Holy Ghost, which is the gift of God unto all those who diligently seek Him, as well in times of old as in the time that He should manifest Himself unto the children of men. 18 For He is the same yesterday, today, and forever, and the way is prepared for all men from the foundation of the world, if it so be that they repent and come unto Him. 19 For he that diligently seeketh shall find, and the mysteries of God shall be unfolded unto them by the power of the Holy Ghost, as well in these times as in times of old, and as well in times of old as in times to come. Wherefore, the course of the Lord is one eternal round. Now, this is powerful. Let's think about what it's saying really fast: "He that diligently seeketh shall find." That's a promise that if you really look for the mysteries of God, it will be given unto you. We just need to look and work fo...

"Oh, qué lo qué? How it be? Imma just hit the title in the beginning. So, we found this lady who really likes us, almost too much. Anyways, Puerto Ricans are a lot like me. They're just honest; they say it how it be, just straight up and honest. Honestly nice until it's about your Spanish. Anyways, we call this lady... Turns out she's already a member, baptized in San Souci. Anyways, she's like, "Yo, my girlfriend" (we're like, "What? Your girlfriend?"). Anyways, not the point. She's like, "Yo, you guys got bathrooms in your church?" We're like, "Uh, yeah, why? Cuántos?" (How many?) Like a few toilets, why? Ok, mi pareja tiene Pampers porque ella tiene mucho diarrea! And at this point, we're just like about to laugh but also puke. Then she's like (to her girlfriend), "Yo, get baptized. It's easy. They'll just dunk you in a river!" And we're like (in our heads), yeah, the problem is sh...

Well, well, well, to start off, I hate writing emails again, just so you guys can know, one more time, that I hate it. Although I do like to let you guys hear my stories, honestly, I'm highly considering going MIA for like 3 months like other missionaries, but this week I'll write. We had a crazy Tuesday this last week. So, we were driving and saw a guy with no tire, so we stopped and talked to him and helped him change his tire. We also gave some guy that lives in a trailer my space heater (and it was such a random prompting). Then, we found some super cool guy named Alexis. Went to zone conference and saw all my homies. I love zone conference, I learned a lot. One thing I took away that was super cool was that we don't "need to worry what to say because by the time we say it and it hits the hearts of our friends, the spirit has already changed what we said" - President Skinner. I have evidence of this this week. We passed by the house of Gisel and taught her the...